I know I'm starting this half way through the year, but that's okay. Better late than never, right? My little man, always with the busy, busy hands. I blame that on his italian daddy :)

The first weekend we were home with DJ I went around announcing to everyone that he would be our only child. The standard response was that it's too early, that I would change my mind, and even though at the time I begrudgingly said they were probably right, as time has gone on this has been something that I think about constantly.

Growing up I always wanted two children; I (for some reason) never liked the thought of raising an only child - but I'm coming around to the idea. A lot of my reasoning is rather personal so I will leave that out of the discussion, but the more I think about it, the more it makes the most sense for my family.

If you are an only child, or a parent having only one child, I would love to hear your thoughts / reasoning / concerns.

Welcome to project life 2013 | week 22 (May 27 - Jun 2)

Smiling like crazy when I click my tongue.

Loving sleeping the last couple hours at night in bed between mom and dad.

Holding your hands in front of your face and studying them with a very focused look on your face.

Sucking on your fist and emitting the cutest (and loudest) sucking noises.

Beginning to reach out for toys held within your reach.

Loving being in just your diaper during this hot Vegas weather.

Almost always falling asleep whenever you're in the car.

Emitting what I believe is the very beginning stages of laughter.

An hour into your nighttime sleep, you cry out in what sounds like a little dog barking. It may just be the cutest thing this mama has ever heard before.

You still hate having a wet diaper, especially when you're wearing cloth.

There are days that I catch myself thinking or even saying out loud: "I can't wait until DJ can really play with his toys," or "I'm so excited to be able to take him swimming or to the park." And then I have to remind myself to slow down and enjoy him as he is today. Because today he smiles when he sees himself in the mirror, and coos and gurgles at me after he finishes a bottle. Today he stares with such intensity when you hold a rattle in front of his face, and his hands move very slowly towards it as though he is willing them to stop flailing around and get down to business. Today he gives us sleepy smiles in the dead of the night as though to say "sorry I'm keeping you up."

Yesterday he introduced a new cry that sounds just a little less like a baby and more like a young boy. Yesterday he smiled the widest I've ever seen when I sang along to the Nashville soundtrack while he wrapped his entire fists around my thumbs and danced. Yesterday he was one day younger than he is today.

I need to slow down and enjoy him as a newborn. Enjoy the lack of sleep, the seemingly endless cups of coffee that it takes to get through many days. I need to enjoy him allowing us to cuddle with him in our bed for a few extra minutes in the morning. I need to allow myself to drown in how it feels to be wholly needed, to be in charge of someone's life so completely. I need to stop wishing time away so that he can 'do more,' because one day he will be running around getting into mischief. One day he will be pulling my hair or pushing away from me when I try to snuggle with him. One day (soon) he won't be my baby anymore. One day soon he will need me just a little less.

So I dare myself to slow down. I dare myself to enjoy every day, no matter how difficult it is. I dare myself to stop looking so far ahead and just enjoy the boy that DJ is today, at this moment, because just like that, the moment will be over, left as just a memory swimming around in my crowded head.

Last Friday was my 29th birthday. Where has the time gone? I'm going to be honest and say that it's a little bittersweet because ever since I turned 25 I've been dreading turning 30, and now I'm only a year away.

I always get reflective around these times (on birthdays, at New Years etc), just thinking about all that has happened in the past year and all that is just around the corner this year. 28 was a great year though; after all, it brought me my darling baby boy! but I am looking forward to my 29th year and watching DJ grow, which he hopefully won't do too quickly.

hello project life 2013 week 19 + 20.